Infertility Still Affects Us

Infertility still affects Chase and I. I wished it didn’t. I wished I wouldn’t feel bad for every post I share of Kason. But, if I don’t share what a joy he is to our family, then how can I instill hope and encouragement into your hearts that infertility is just a season?

I’m still affected by others struggling with infertility, even those that I don’t know, and they don’t know me. All they see is another pregnant lady or mom, but they don’t see the years of struggling that took place to get this miracle. Kason is almost a year and any random person would not know that I’ve been through infertility without me first saying something.

I’m still affected by pregnancy posts after years of struggling with infertility. Shortly after we brought Kason home, everyone’s attention seemed to move on to other things. While we felt like our miracle should’ve been shouted from the rooftops, in reality, it felt as if it had all gotten lost with all of the other announcements and the next exciting thing. It felt like our 7-year struggle and miracle baby thunder was taken out from under us.

I’m still affected when other moms talk so freely about growing their family. A few thoughts come to my mind when this happens around me:

  1. Will I be able to get pregnant again, or will I have to suffer through the pain again for several more years?
  2. You talk about growing your family as if it were as easy as going to the store and buying groceries. It still doesn’t feel fair.

I’m still affected by Mother’s Day. Thank goodness that this years Mother’s Day was just a normal day. Chase was worried that I would tell him off if he even wished me a “Happy Mother’s Day” that he said nothing. Before we headed to church I broke down crying and told him that yes, I wanted to be recognized, but I felt bad for wanting to be happy and celebrating.

I’m in no way complaining, because this is life, and I’m trying to navigate the aftermath of infertility. But I am also trying to help those that are still in the midst of infertility understand that the pain still bothers us even after we have our miracle baby in our arms.

For those that have gotten their miracle, do you have the same feelings?


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2 Comments

  1. Amanda

    May 23, 2018 at 10:45 am

    Thank you for sharing this post Tedi. I’ve had friends who have made it to the other side of infertility, and they say the same thing. That it still affects them. That pregnancy announcements are still hard. But to cry because you’re not sure if you should celebrate? My heart breaks for that. You should absolutely celebrate!! Its a milestone! You’ve done a lot in a year!
    It’s something I didn’t think about though, thank you for sharing your journey!

    1. Tedi Palmer

      May 29, 2018 at 4:45 pm

      Amanda, Thank you for your sincere comment!

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